hopefully

i just wish not to have this kind feeling, if time could back. i hope i won't feel too deep. to anything or anyone. this is so killing me.

i hope, i really hope to be with someone who madly in love to me, and just love me more as much as i can. i hope to meet someone else. someone new, someone might thought that can be the one i can count on everything. i want someone like hero. but i am afraid. too afraid to let go. i don't think i can be loved that much as i wanted. 

i want to let go. to feel loved like the movie. 

i am so afraid. 
i am so scared of not being happy. because i can't be happy on my own.

i can't make myself happy. i just don't know how.

i am afraid of him will not let me be happy.

i am afraid to choose the wrong one.
dear god,
i want to lose this all kind of feeling.

i don't want to feel this kind any of feeling anymore.
let it go, let me be free. 

let me love myself more than i can do.
i don't want to be in love, especially with a human.

oh please,
save me. :(